10. The Descent.

The worst day of my life. I’m telling you, this was the worst day I had ever had. My husband decided to go see a movie with his sister, his dad was at work, and me and his mom were at the house.

I had previously talked to my mother, who was struggling to keep her blood pressure after the heart attack. She had messaged my husband’s mother to ask if there was a way to make sure she could get ahold of me. His mom is very passive aggressive, I’ve learned. She sweetly told her that if I would get a job, I could afford a phone and that they could not afford to get me a phone. Which, my mom and I both knew that. That kind of shit pisses my mother off and she was saying her blood pressure was rising.

So that day, while she and I were both home, I talked to her. My babies were napping in separate rooms. I asked her (very nicely, mind you) if she could not talk to my mother on Facebook. She couldn’t handle her blood pressure rising.

His mother suddenly went off screaming, “Your mom’s a BITCH!”

Now. I am not the kind of person to yell. I do not go off on people. But something inside me fucking snapped. My mom just had a heart attack. How fucking dare this bitch insult her! And I let her have it. I started screaming, “Are you fucking kidding me? My mom just had a heart attack!”

In which she responded, “So! Lots of people have heart attacks!”

“She almost DIED!”

“People die every day!”

And then it pretty much escalated from there. I believe I may have called her every insulting thing in the book. I yelled how her kids couldn’t fucking stand her because she was a psychotic bitch.

Then she threatened to show me psychotic and started insulting my parenting, saying my son was slow.

I just thought about how I’ve never wanted to hit someone so bad as I did this bitch. I wanted to beat the living shit out of her and I am not a fighter. Not by a long shot.

She suggested I go to another room to get some air. I thought for a moment, my kids are sleeping in both of the bedrooms and the other room was hers. So, I took her advice, and stepped out front to take a breather.

I was trying to calm down when I heard the worst sound of my life. The sound of the deadbolt locking.

This bitch just locked me away from my children and out of this house.

I start banging on the door screaming for her to let me in. I thought about breaking the window where my kids were sleeping. I should have. That would have been better than what I did. Not a second goes by that I didn’t wish I broke open that window, took my children and ran away.

But no. I did the stupidest thing I have ever done in my life. When I realized the psycho bitch was not going to let me back in, I went to the neighbor’s house. They didn’t speak much English but let me use their phone. I called my husband and told him what his mother did. He sounded annoyed and said he was on his way.

I saw in the driveway waiting for him to come home. His dad came home. He looked at me and reassuringly said, “I know,” and he went to take care of his wife. My husband returned home and said to me that he would talk to her and convince her to let me back in. The two of them were so calm, as if this kind of behavior for her was normal. Her husband was extremely cool, laid-back, and hilarious. She, on the other hand, was a controlling, high-strung, bipolar psycho.

My husband was in that house for 45 mins before he came out. He looked exasperated. “Look, she’s not gonna let you back in. I’m going to drive you to a hotel for a night. Hopefully she will calm down tomorrow. I’ll take care of the kids. You need a night to yourself to relax. You are always doing everything with the kids. You need a break.”

That was really thoughtful of him. He went inside and packed up some things I would need for the night. We drove a little ways outside the city and he checked me in to the motel. He gave me $80. I had a credit card which had never been used and about $500 in my account, which was to be used to pay for my college classes.

I used some of the money to walk to Walmart and get myself a cheap little flip phone. That was an adventure. I was in a town I had never been. Everything was completely foreign to me. I came back to the room and messaged my husband. I asked about the kids and he told me they were doing good. I told him I wanted them out of there. I said that we should use our money and get us a small place until I could move out on my own.

There was no response. He didn’t respond. I tried calling him. It just rang and rang and then went to voicemail. I start blowing up his Facebook.

Why aren’t you answering your phone?

I want to see the kids.

I want them out of there.

Are you purposely keeping me from them?

I guess I’m paying for another night.

Okay, he finally responded.

The next day.

Why won’t you answer your phone? Will you call me please?

So you’re cool with sending me away, but not helping me?

Why won’t you let me fucking talk to my kids?

You can’t keep them away from me!

No response. No answer. Just voicemail.

Oh my fucking god. He just. He took my kids from me. I’m alone in a state where I have no family, no friends, and no knowledge about anything in this state. I was completely alone. Never have I felt more alone in my life than I did in that moment. A moment that to this day, still haunts and torments me. I was the world’s biggest fool. An absolute fucking idiot. Why didn’t I call the cops when his mom locked me out? Why did I call him?

HOW DID I NOT KNOW THERE WERE TRULY EVIL PEOPLE IN THE WORLD???

All questions I ask myself every day afterward. I trusted him. I FUCKING TRUSTED HIM. We were on good terms. And when his mother got involved, something changed. This was not the man I married.

Or maybe it was. I mean, let’s be honest, he was a piece of shit while we dated. And then while we were married. But I never thought him capable of something like this. Then it occurred to me. Over the summer, we had gotten a bunch of backpay from the military, about $7000. Suddenly the $7000 disappeared out of the account. I confronted my husband about it and he said he put it in CDs so it could acquire interest. I accused him of trying to screw me over. He didn’t like that.

He also didn’t like that I tried to install a keylogger. Most men don’t dig the idea. But if they were trustworthy, I WOULDN’T NEED THE FUCKING KEYLOGGER. But I digress. My dumbass did not pay for said keylogger. I installed the free version, not knowing it was a piece of shit. Or the fact that it left a window open in the background.

So, when he found it, he was not particularly thrilled. So much so, that he got in my face. He got really close to me with menacing eyes. He was shirtless, and I put my hands lightly on his chest and gently pushed him away, to indicate that he needed to get out of my face. He was making me uncomfortable.

He grabbed my wrists and slammed them against the wall. His grip was tight and he was hurting me. He yelled at me and I got scared. I was in pain and he didn’t care. I shoved him away and ran to the living room to call security forces.

He grabbed the phone from my hands and I was so scared he was gonna continue to hurt me and be a psycho, I grabbed the phone and threw it at him as hard as I could. Now that I think about it, that’s the only man I have ever thrown anything at. He scared the shit out of me.

Not quite sure how we had resolved this, but we did.

But now, now it made sense. There were no CDs. My suspicions were right. 9/10 times they are. I should know this by now.

What was I to do?

I did the only thing I could think of. I took to social media and blasted the whole situation. Everybody was giving me advice. I talked to my parents, my aunts, Max even. He and I talked a whole lot about what was going on. He was genuinely concerned. It made it a teensy bit easier. Not much though. I was still without my world. My reason for living.

Then a thought popped into my head. The only person I knew in this entire state.

Fuck..

But…really?

You’ve got to fucking be kidding me. This is such total bullshit.

But it was the only hope I had, or I would be homeless.

I messaged Hannah, the woman who helped destroy my marriage. I told her what he had done to me and how I didn’t know what to do.

She asked where I was and I told her. She said she’d be there in 15 mins.

 

 

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